I treat everyone beautifully because
I understand karma, you see
- mine reacts swiftly
- to any misdeed.
And while I considered
how I shouldn’t Twitter – tell
the whole world ‘bout yo shit and ‘er …
how you just can’t keep it together …
I come across a note, addressed to no one in particular, and among many
other things says that you made me what I am and how I ...
… well … GAWDAMN?!?!??
I run, look in the mirror
…cause I just got to know
Exactly what about ME a brotha wanna take credit for ?!?!
Did he make me black?
Did he make me female?
Did he craft my intelligence?
Did he train me in my talent?
The answer would be NO to any and all four but
I’ll tell you what he did dude
let his pride blind his wisdom and
when he shoulda been beggin' me
and tryin’ to see how we
could regain harmony
was not understandin’
karma you’ll find
- will ruin you everytime.
Ask yourself - is it worth the risk?
Bisous!
Monday, June 29, 2009
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
The Pain and The Pleasure
I bit into a lemon wedge today. Frowned and squinted, tears welled in my eyes cuz the acidic juice made my jaw lock up tight.
Lemon juice is so refreshing.
My Steve Madden’s with the toe out and the little ruffle over the middle of the foot, are so high, they make me feel like I’m perpetually walking downhill. I have to make an effort to consciously walk upright and take small steps, like on stilts. I can only take a few hours of it before my feet scream, but they’re SOoooo pretty.
They make me smile.
Worked out this morning. Arms feel like limp noodles. Coffee splashing over the sides of the rim when I lift the pot from the counter cuz it feels like a 20 pound dumbbell. But just last night my friend remarked that I look really strong, I was pleased.
As the saying goes…no pain, no gain.
The illustrations are to say that in our western culture we want to extract every drop of pleasure out of an experience while managing to avoid the pain. I say “we” to be politically correct, but truth be told, I’ve come to understand the sum of my soul’s desire.
Is an experience worth having if you don’t feel the fullness of it? I say a sure NO. I know that emotion is felt most intensely when you put all of your being in and savor the bad with the good. And ... if at the end of it all ... molasses runs out of the tip of the blade that stabbed me … I’ll smile every time I touch the scar.
Bisous!
Lemon juice is so refreshing.
My Steve Madden’s with the toe out and the little ruffle over the middle of the foot, are so high, they make me feel like I’m perpetually walking downhill. I have to make an effort to consciously walk upright and take small steps, like on stilts. I can only take a few hours of it before my feet scream, but they’re SOoooo pretty.
They make me smile.
Worked out this morning. Arms feel like limp noodles. Coffee splashing over the sides of the rim when I lift the pot from the counter cuz it feels like a 20 pound dumbbell. But just last night my friend remarked that I look really strong, I was pleased.
As the saying goes…no pain, no gain.
The illustrations are to say that in our western culture we want to extract every drop of pleasure out of an experience while managing to avoid the pain. I say “we” to be politically correct, but truth be told, I’ve come to understand the sum of my soul’s desire.
Is an experience worth having if you don’t feel the fullness of it? I say a sure NO. I know that emotion is felt most intensely when you put all of your being in and savor the bad with the good. And ... if at the end of it all ... molasses runs out of the tip of the blade that stabbed me … I’ll smile every time I touch the scar.
Bisous!
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Give and Take
Does a little girl's worth begin in the eyes of her father?
My wish for all fathers is to appreciate that when you
take the time to go out with your daughter you give her means by which to
measure with whom she spends hers
When you take her hand in yours, you give her an understanding
Of what it is to be held in high regard and protected
When you take interest in her, you give clear communication
that without having to merit, she is special
When you find that you need to take leave of your daughter’s mother
make sure to give your daughter an independent identity, after all … it’s not her that you can’t live with.
I’m proud to know some awesome fathers.
Happy Father’s Day!
My wish for all fathers is to appreciate that when you
take the time to go out with your daughter you give her means by which to
measure with whom she spends hers
When you take her hand in yours, you give her an understanding
Of what it is to be held in high regard and protected
When you take interest in her, you give clear communication
that without having to merit, she is special
When you find that you need to take leave of your daughter’s mother
make sure to give your daughter an independent identity, after all … it’s not her that you can’t live with.
I’m proud to know some awesome fathers.
Happy Father’s Day!
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Just .. Think About That For a Minute
When the Pawn Hits the Conflicts, He Thinks Like a King
What He Knows Throws the Blows When He Goes to the Fight
and He'll Win the Whole Thing 'Fore He Enters the Ring
There's No Body to Batter When Your Mind Is Your Might
So When You Go Solo, You Hold Your Own Hand
and Remember That Depth Is the Greatest of Heights
and If You Know Where You Stand, Then You'll Know Where to Land
and If You Fall It Won't Matter, Cuz You'll Know That You're Right !!
Wow. Just think about that for a minute. Let those words sink into your psyche. Those 90 words make up the title to Fiona Apple's second album released back in 1999. When I first read those words, I connected with them so fully that I fantasized for a whole month about tattoo'ing them on my torso. Once common sense won out I printed them on a piece of paper and tacked it up on my bulletin board. I ran across that tattered piece of paper this morning and re-reading the words gave me a jolt ... wanted to share it here with those of you who may be unaware of this magnificently talented girl.
It's worth listening to!
Bisous
What He Knows Throws the Blows When He Goes to the Fight
and He'll Win the Whole Thing 'Fore He Enters the Ring
There's No Body to Batter When Your Mind Is Your Might
So When You Go Solo, You Hold Your Own Hand
and Remember That Depth Is the Greatest of Heights
and If You Know Where You Stand, Then You'll Know Where to Land
and If You Fall It Won't Matter, Cuz You'll Know That You're Right !!
Wow. Just think about that for a minute. Let those words sink into your psyche. Those 90 words make up the title to Fiona Apple's second album released back in 1999. When I first read those words, I connected with them so fully that I fantasized for a whole month about tattoo'ing them on my torso. Once common sense won out I printed them on a piece of paper and tacked it up on my bulletin board. I ran across that tattered piece of paper this morning and re-reading the words gave me a jolt ... wanted to share it here with those of you who may be unaware of this magnificently talented girl.
It's worth listening to!
Bisous
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
What do you value?
OK. This post is a piggie-back of the dialogue started under Mr. Gregory Dicks' page.
I believe we can all identify the problems in a relationship. What I’d like to offer is what I believe is a solution. It’s critically important to identify what you value in a relationship before choosing a mate. If you don't know what you value then you'll settle for what pleases at the moment. I was blessed to be able to identify what I value at the age of 30. Late, but better than never! It was life changing. Once you identify what you value and then you measure every(one or thing) against your values - it either matches up or it doesn't! There's no process of wait and see or any probationary-maybe-it/he/she'll-get-better period. You know right away. Now THERE'S where my problem came in!! At 30 I'd already been married for 5 years and then went through this 12 wk program and discovered what I value in a man, in a relationship, in a marriage. I was sick to look at my life and understand CLEARLY for the first time that how I was living and what I said I valued didn't match up??!!!! I tried, then, for the next 10 years to make how I was living and what I value match. I believe ... the same as I believe that Jesus is the son of God ... that if you identify what you value in a thing - and then you live your life to what you value ... you will ALWAYS be happy. It's my gospel. After ten years, I couldn't get it to match, so I had to make some hard choices and some hard changes to make them match. I am very happy now. I'm trying to develop a program to teach values identification to pre-teens and teens ... that is the age at which time we start to navigate relationships with the opposite sex and start venturing into the work force. Man, I could go on and on about it ... and I do ... to anyone who'll listen because I'm really passionate about it. I believe it'll prevent teenage pregnancies and teenage abuse and generally create a more satisfied generation of people as they mature ... cause when you're happy, you don't tend to hate on other people, ya know?
Bisous
I believe we can all identify the problems in a relationship. What I’d like to offer is what I believe is a solution. It’s critically important to identify what you value in a relationship before choosing a mate. If you don't know what you value then you'll settle for what pleases at the moment. I was blessed to be able to identify what I value at the age of 30. Late, but better than never! It was life changing. Once you identify what you value and then you measure every(one or thing) against your values - it either matches up or it doesn't! There's no process of wait and see or any probationary-maybe-it/he/she'll-get-better period. You know right away. Now THERE'S where my problem came in!! At 30 I'd already been married for 5 years and then went through this 12 wk program and discovered what I value in a man, in a relationship, in a marriage. I was sick to look at my life and understand CLEARLY for the first time that how I was living and what I said I valued didn't match up??!!!! I tried, then, for the next 10 years to make how I was living and what I value match. I believe ... the same as I believe that Jesus is the son of God ... that if you identify what you value in a thing - and then you live your life to what you value ... you will ALWAYS be happy. It's my gospel. After ten years, I couldn't get it to match, so I had to make some hard choices and some hard changes to make them match. I am very happy now. I'm trying to develop a program to teach values identification to pre-teens and teens ... that is the age at which time we start to navigate relationships with the opposite sex and start venturing into the work force. Man, I could go on and on about it ... and I do ... to anyone who'll listen because I'm really passionate about it. I believe it'll prevent teenage pregnancies and teenage abuse and generally create a more satisfied generation of people as they mature ... cause when you're happy, you don't tend to hate on other people, ya know?
Bisous
Monday, June 15, 2009
In The Dark
I cried for you last night
Sobs of frustration and pain
Bitterness and bile stain
The soul whole necessitates prayer
I dreamed of you last night
Only you weren’t you
But a darkly hued stranger
In a you suit
I wanted you last night
But did not touch myself
instead
I held myself and made to myself
promises of truth and light
Smiled 'bout my Phoenician rebirth
and thanked God that no man determines
the measure of my worth.
Sobs of frustration and pain
Bitterness and bile stain
The soul whole necessitates prayer
I dreamed of you last night
Only you weren’t you
But a darkly hued stranger
In a you suit
I wanted you last night
But did not touch myself
instead
I held myself and made to myself
promises of truth and light
Smiled 'bout my Phoenician rebirth
and thanked God that no man determines
the measure of my worth.
Saturday, June 13, 2009
Rat Bastard
Have you ever heard someone call someone else a rat bastard? The first time I heard the term was in a movie, it made me laugh hard. Didn’t really think anything about the actual coinage. Today, as I wiled away hours at the hair salon, I read an article about the chemistry of love. This particular author talked about brain chemistry and the interplay of the fear-love connection in attraction. She cited a study done by [I will not name the] University that supposedly proved that the brain of male rats was aroused whenever a new female rat was dropped into the scene. Given time, the male would get tired of copulating with the new female, and start to ignore her.
!!Quelle Surprise!! It’s not until another new female rat is introduced that the male rat becomes re-ignited. But the study also noted that simply because the male rat’s enthusiasm returned when a new female was introduced, it didn’t mean that the male “felt” better for being with a new female.
The male behavior seems to be in the DNA. Unavoidable and easily explained away by “it is what it is” or “this is the way God made the male”.
I found this study fascinating. And I caution you all …
Observe, closely, the behavior of your target, and if he displays this pattern of functioning, understand that it’s not you. It’s his issue, his flaw, his loss … it’s him. Not you. Recognize that a woman's worth is fueled by realizing one's own accomplishments as measured against one’s own goals. Has nothing to do with another human being. Or … in this case … with any rat bastard.
A note for my male followers: Likewise, the female rat only shook her tail at a new male rat but would not shake her tail when a familiar male rat dropped by to check on her.
!!Quelle Surprise!! It’s not until another new female rat is introduced that the male rat becomes re-ignited. But the study also noted that simply because the male rat’s enthusiasm returned when a new female was introduced, it didn’t mean that the male “felt” better for being with a new female.
The male behavior seems to be in the DNA. Unavoidable and easily explained away by “it is what it is” or “this is the way God made the male”.
I found this study fascinating. And I caution you all …
Observe, closely, the behavior of your target, and if he displays this pattern of functioning, understand that it’s not you. It’s his issue, his flaw, his loss … it’s him. Not you. Recognize that a woman's worth is fueled by realizing one's own accomplishments as measured against one’s own goals. Has nothing to do with another human being. Or … in this case … with any rat bastard.
A note for my male followers: Likewise, the female rat only shook her tail at a new male rat but would not shake her tail when a familiar male rat dropped by to check on her.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
I am ...
A woman's worth is a blog about women living their lives free-spirited, independent-thinking and with forward progress, in FULL knowledge of our worth.
Getting to a place where one feels worthy though is sometimes a long arduous road. It starts when we're mere babies. In this age of post-partum depression when moms are unable to connect and bond with their child from the womb ... it's little wonder that from the outset some of us enter the world wondering if we're worthy. Little kids learn early to alienate each other with their cliques ... include some and exclude others. You walk away feeling unworthy of playing with those kids who snubbed you. This continues on and only gets worse as we enter our teenage years and start navigating relationships with the opposite sex. The one you love loves someone else. You feel unworthy of love.
In this blog I'll discuss what I see as some of the obstacles to feeling worthy and talk about all the wonderful possibilities for overcoming those obstacles whether you're 5 or 75.
I am deserving, admirable, honorable, valuable, useful and meritorious. I am worthy. And so are you!
Bisous!
Getting to a place where one feels worthy though is sometimes a long arduous road. It starts when we're mere babies. In this age of post-partum depression when moms are unable to connect and bond with their child from the womb ... it's little wonder that from the outset some of us enter the world wondering if we're worthy. Little kids learn early to alienate each other with their cliques ... include some and exclude others. You walk away feeling unworthy of playing with those kids who snubbed you. This continues on and only gets worse as we enter our teenage years and start navigating relationships with the opposite sex. The one you love loves someone else. You feel unworthy of love.
In this blog I'll discuss what I see as some of the obstacles to feeling worthy and talk about all the wonderful possibilities for overcoming those obstacles whether you're 5 or 75.
I am deserving, admirable, honorable, valuable, useful and meritorious. I am worthy. And so are you!
Bisous!
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